Jake and I have broken up and we’re in the process of moving out. I’ve nicknamed our split ‘Jexit’ to try and lighten the mood but it’s not really working. I’m devastated.
For the last two and a half years Jake’s made me happier than I ever thought I could be and I kinda always thought we’d be together forever. I know that might sound daft but I just couldn’t imagine it ending.
Not only have I lost my boyfriend, I’ve also lost my best friend. I think my current mood can be summed up with this Mark Corrigan gif.
Since Jake’s looking for a spare room in a shared house, at first I thought I’d stay in the flat on my own. I love this place and wanted to stay here so badly but I can’t deal with the gap in the wardrobe, the lonely toothbrush on the sink and a big Jake-shaped hole in the bed.
It also dawned on me that if I stayed in the flat alone, I’d be paying around £900 a month in living expenses. I could technically afford to pay this but what’s the point in spending such a large percentage of my salary on being miserable? I wouldn’t have much left over to save and I wouldn’t have much left over to spend.
I’m hardly a big spender anyway but I’ll have to be a little less frugal if I’m gonna survive this break up without going crazy. I need to start seeing my friends more often and meeting new people. Jake and I are in agreement that since we’ve been together, we’ve kinda neglected our friendships with others.
So, considering the amount it would cost me to live alone, I’m left with two choices:
- Move into a shared house
- Move in with my parents for what feels like the millionth time
I can’t actually believe I’m saying this but I’ve chosen the second option. I’m moving in with my parents again. I feel like I’m going round in circles.
When I told the ‘rents about Jexit, they encouraged me to move back home and start binge-saving a deposit again so that I can buy a home on my own… as was the original plan. We’re hopeful that by next summer, I should be in a position to start house hunting.
When Jake and I first started talking about moving in together at the start of this year, my determination to buy a place of my own kinda faded a little. I liked the idea of postponing my home-buying plans and buying a house together in a few years.
Since that’s no longer a possibility, I may as well go ‘all in’ and do this by myself.
If I can save a deposit and buy a house on my own, that’s over and done with. I won’t have to rely on a future partner to get what I want. Nor will I have to slow my plans down so that someone else can catch up.
I know that moving in with my parents is hardly the most independent option, but I really believe it’s the best option for me right now. When life gives you lemons you’ve got to make lemonade. And that’s what I’m going to do.
Standing on your own two feet is all well and good but sometimes you have to swallow your pride and accept help from those who are willing and able.
